(Jim #13) — There’s no doubt, all this tech stuff is impressive. Above is a photo of me and my new cell phone taken by my computer. Next to it is a photo of me and my new computer taken by my cell phone. I’m using special effects on both (but it’s probably not hiding the fact that personal grooming has hit the skids of late.)
These gadgets are designed to make our lives easier. That’s the idea anyway. I’m still waiting for that part to kick in.
It’s a good thing I don’t have a full-time job anymore. It’s taken me about three days to figure out how to snap a photo with my phone and then e-mail it to myself.
It’s quite a life I’ve carved out for myself. I walk around taking photos and videos with my phone, then I e-mail them to myself. Then I blunder around until I’ve shrunk the photos, uploaded them, and somehow managed to post them onto this blog.
In the midst of all this, I’ve experienced some major glitches. I managed to trash the hard drive on my old computer. I discovered that my new MacBook laptop had a bad CD drive, so I drove to Eureka to have it fixed, only to discover that it really wasn’t fixed. After a lengthy negotiation with Apple, I managed to convince the company to replace the computer. That required a drive to Sacramento. (And all of this driving is great, because, let’s face it, they’re practically giving away gas away these days. Actually, a little sub-rant here: It wasn’t that long ago that our area congressman, Wally Herger, was on record complaining that Bill Clinton was “highjacking America” with these soaring, out-of-control gas prices. Well, at that time, gas was a whopping $1.50 a gallon. Now we’re approaching $4 a gallon — I saw it higher than that on our recent trip — and I’m not sure what happened to Herger’s angry rhetoric. At least the high gas prices aren’t impacting anything else. I was just at Safeway where they have a “brand-new low price” on a loaf of bread — $4.48.)
Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, technology.
I’m now the owner of a Samsung Katalyst cell phone which does photos, video, links to wi-fi, has voice recognition and a music player. You crack an egg on it and it whips up a damn fine Denver omelet. (I assume it also makes phone calls, though I haven’t gotten around to that part.)
I talked them into giving me this technological marvel for free because I was having so much trouble with my last phone. After about a day’s worth of negotiation with T-Mobile reps, we settled on the fact that it was a bad SIM card. (A SIM card goes inside your phone and holds essential information that allows you to have a functioning phone.)
Anyway, I must say, this Katalyst phone is pretty incredible. Still, everything has a learning curve. Often, the fancier the technological item is, the more you have to learn about it. Each application on the MacBook has a learning curve — GarageBand, iMovie, iPhotos, Pages. All those learning curves tend to add up. My method has been to bumble into these technological challenges and flounder until I learn a few basic functions. Rarely do I ever fully unlock the full potential of any of them.
I’m sure teenagers blast through this stuff with the ease of changing their socks. But I’m older and not all that bright. It takes a long time for new concepts to sink in (if at all).
But, let’s face it, by squaring up to all these challenges, I’ve become a better man. Isn’t that apparent?
I’m so there. I’d like to think the technology is complicated. I fear it’s just that my synapses don’t fire as rapidly as they used to be. I’m much, much, much older, though, so take heart.
But learn quickly — before the braincrete hardens!
p.s. Is that a blue sunburn? Wouldn’t Blue Sunburn be a good band name? (Not better than JDB, but still.)
Jim don’t worry ’bout the hygene stuff; I’d grow a Rip Van Winkle beard and mutton chops if I could!
Good on ya, O Hairy One!
Lookin’ good Dyar! Candace is one lucky woman.
Our children — who are in charge of all of our A/V equipment — are away on vacation this week.
Craig and I were very proud to have figured out (without too much cursing) how to watch a DVD all by ourselves — though rewinding the bugger still has us baffled.
See, Jim. These are the kind of conversations we’d be having if you still sat next to me. I cry a little every day.
But seriously, reading over your blog, you seem happier, healthier and more content than ever. And that makes me smile.
Yep, all of this new technology saves us lots of time, ey? By the way, Consumer Reports asked its readers where they turned when computer problems surfaced. The number one answer was “the kids.”
We’d be happy to donate a razor to the Jim Dyar Unemployment Fund.
Cut your hair, you goddamn hippie.
Why do you hate America?